Revised Introduction

For this post I will share my new and improved introduction along with my old introduction.

Morgan, Tim. "trash" 12/19/05 via Flickr. Attribution 2.0 Generic

Old Introduction: 
"Today, we are in an age of technological innovation. Technology consumes our lives, whether it be through social media, television or even simply the transportation we use daily. However, what if this technology were to take over our lives in a more literal sense? This fear of losing our place as the top organism increases as science moves closer to producing a robot with human-like intelligence. Ben Medlock, however, argues that the good that can come from this “artificial intelligence” outweighs the possibilities of our fears coming true. In his article “Fear must not hold back new era of artificial intelligence”, he uses his status as CTO and co-founder of SwiftKey, an organization that produces AI, to effectively convince his audience that AI is not to be feared, along with presenting his own statistics and keeping his professional tone consistent."

New Introduction:
"Today, we are in an age of technological innovation. Technology consumes our lives, whether it be through social media, television or even simply the transportation we use daily. However, what if this technology were to take over our lives in a more literal sense? This fear of losing our place as the top organism increases as science moves closer to producing a robot with human-like intelligence. Ben Medlock, however, argues that the good that can come from this “artificial intelligence” outweighs the possibilities of our fears coming true. This paper will explore the rhetorical strategies present in his article “Fear must not hold back new era of artificial intelligence” so that we may learn how to better analyze other articles. In this article, Medlock uses his status as CTO and co-founder of SwiftKey to effectively convince his audience that AI is not to be feared, along with presenting his own statistics and keeping a formal tone. "

I believe that the new introduction is better because it introduces my points by explicitly forecasting them, which is better for the purpose of this essay. I also referenced the audience in my new introduction and mentioned why we are rhetorically analyzing this article (so that we may get better at rhetorically analyzing other articles in the future). I also noted that I should probably take the explanation as to what SwiftKey is because I don't want to have too much information in my introduction and that is explained later in my essay.